Tuesday, January 31, 2012
β₯ World best investment! ππ π‘π
Omg! Looking back at all the old photos, I actually still have clothes and shoes which are bought way back from year 2008!!!! Look how long it is! 3 years plus!! Can last so long! No matter how many times i moved! Hahaha. Shopping is a good investment right! ;p
9:20:00 PM
Monday, January 30, 2012
β₯ Awesome iPhone!
Now I know why people just get stucked with iPhone! No matter which generation it is, the sales will be superb. Even with one model of phone, it can be a giant phone manufacturer. The secret all lies in the comprehensive APP STORE! They have all the apps that you can think of! Ranging from Photography, games, torch light, dictionary, blogger, Mobile banking, Facebook, twitter, lookbook, Taobao, gmarket, 9gag, media player, icathay, etc etc! And guess what app I found today! Photo bucket! Hahah. Okok I know you must be like "huh, what's the big deal". But hey! I try to open safari for photo bucket and there's an error loading page, so I decided to try my luck at the app store with the mindset that there wont be such app. But end up have!! Hahah. Awesome right! Even small things like photo bucket, they have! What else can you think of! Haha. Well downloading photo bucket so I can upload videos to my blog! Haha.
Anything you can do on mobile! It's not a phone, it's a super mini laptop which allows easy access of apps and phone dialling! Haha.
Anything you can do on mobile! It's not a phone, it's a super mini laptop which allows easy access of apps and phone dialling! Haha.
6:54:00 PM
β₯ CNY hampers!
Hampers distributed today! Let you guys see my hampers! Haha. It's the one with the flower! Cute right! Haha.
Take a look at other big hampers....
6:43:00 PM
β₯ Cute App with a Cute Model!
Come on people, get ready for a good laugh! HAHAHHAHAA!! οΏ½οΏ½
4:49:00 PM
β₯ Looking for a beam of light to guide me to the right pathπ‘β¨
I really need to go borrow some books on how to maintain a relationship, or how to socialise. I totally suck when I meet new people. I couldn't even think of any topics to talk about. I couldn't even take the initiative to make friends.
"how was your performance today?"
So I thought I was rather controlled and independent, not relying on anyone to entertain me, trying to stay in the living room as much as I could, and not to get petty. In order to make things better and not let you be in a difficult position, I stopped relying on you to keep me entertained. I tried to be more independent. I tried to find a place for myself. Until I think I'm in a really awkward position, then I moved upstairs and hid in the room. Even if I'm in the room, I never expect you to come for me, I'm just finding myself a more comfortable spot. I know I really need to get out of my comfort zone. I'm trying hard. I know you have been trying to involve me as much as you can, that's why I never thrower temper at you and I never showed any black face too, I never even expect you to do anything for me! I'm trying hard to be independent, I am.
But apparently to another party I still failed badly. Failed to stay in the living all the time, failed to involve myself, failed to talk to others, and I'm still relying on someone to take me by their side.
I was so afraid that you might get angry, so I tried my best to be independent, but in the end you still ended up being angry.
I'm sorry I failed badly again, I caused stress and trouble to you again.
Or maybe we should look at it from a more positive view? At least we are both putting in efforts right? Why cant both of us be more appreciative towards each other and work towards a better experience next time? Instead of pin pointing each others mistake and expect the other party to change to suit? In a relationship yes you have to compromise. But isn't it supposed to be both party compromising tgt and work tgt? It really hurts when you said im causing you to be very stress. Makes me think why am I so sucky and troublesome, why am I such a lousy girlfriend and have such lousy public relations? I know you might feel rather stress that you have to be a good host so that nobody feel left out. But at the same time, I don't feel good either. Do you think I really like to be a burden to someone? Do you think I rather not to have fun? Do you think i dont feel stress? Im also afraid that people might say i keep hiding in the room and being so insociable, that's why I tried my best to stay below, I tried my best to find a spot for myself. But i just dont know what to talk to them about and nobody talks to me, everyone has their own friends, i just cant help but wanting to hide away to a comfortable place. Do you think I never tried? Do you think I like to see you unhappy?
Why is it that others relationship can get better or get more romantic while mine is getting from good to best to bad to worst? I really need some advice or read some books to enlighten myself. I'm lost right now. I no longer know what to do, how to act, what is the appropriate actions or words.
Sometimes I really wished that my ex step mum is still around with me. She is the person on earth who understands me best. Inside out I can say. Whatever my actions are, I don't even have to explain the way I act, she could already tell others why I acted that way. She is the person who involves me most, in her everything. Probably because that time we were living tgt and girls hit off well. She is also the one who will keep singing praises of me to others, telling people how good I am. And best of all, she's the person who teaches me everything, how to put on a pad, how to pluck hair, how to dress up, how to solve my problems and every other things which I was facing back then. She always guide me along and has never once abandon me and let me fend for myself. Now I'm grown up, I need more advice, I need advice really badly now, where are you? Maybe I should try to fb message her and ask how she is. But then again, is that the right thing to do since the relationship between her and my dad isn't good? I really don't know! Omg, why I suck so much, why can't I determine what is the right thing to do and what is the wrong thing to do? I can predict I will be a super lousy mother in the future. Sigh.
Also I would love to express my gratitude towards Gina. So many years of genuine friendship. So many things that she did for me. I know she always wanted the best for me. She knows how much I don't wanna lose you. And even thou she's still sleeping, she gave me 30over missed calls while I was bathing to ensure that I don't miss out on a guy who I wanna be with, who she knows I can't live without. Makes me feel so guilty that I didn't text her the very moment I woke up. I don't know what got into me too, the day before I already told myself that I have to text her if I already woke up before she called. Probably my eyes which can barely hold itself open screwed up my thinking. My eyes were so heavy this morning, I could barely open them. I'm so sorry Gina to disturb your sleep. Thanks for everything that you have done for me. Im really glad to have a friend like you. Really.
Sometimes I really think I'm way smarter in the past, at the very least I still have some goals in mind and I know what I want and what I don't want. And in the past, I'm much more daring (although my dad always say he give birth to me but didn't give me any guts), at least in the past I dare to talk freely, not afraid that I might hurt anyone unintentionally. Now that I grow up, I tend to think of others feelings, I rather not to talk than to afraid that what I say might be offensive to the other party. That's why I'm slowly starting to keep quiet instead of speaking freely. Gosh. Where did all my intelligence and guts goes?! I need advice, I need someone to lead me along to the right path. I need someone to be there to guide me all the way into my future. Who can really offer to be my mentor for the rest of my life? Tell me the right thing to do, and not reprimand me for all the things that I didn't did good enough in. At least I know I'm trying.
Now I feel so much more comfortable after voicing myself out in my blog. I hope you don't find it as I'm looking for a quarrel or trying to push all the fault to you, cause I'm really not. I just wanna let out somewhere, it's not even meant to be read by anyone. And of course I really appreciate your efforts for involving me, stopping your game cause you know I'm bored, finding something for me to do, coming up again and again to bring me down. I really appreciate you. Thanks. I'm sorry that I ruin your day again, I'll try harder next time. Or maybe we could just save all the trouble by me skipping all these kinda events? I'm really ok with that if it's the only way to avoid affecting our relationship. I'm ok with anything as long as it allows our relationship to grow stronger. Or maybe we should start by talking about it together and come to a agreed conclusion together? I really hope you don't get angry with me again cause of this post, cause that is really not my intention. If you don't agree with any parts that I say, maybe we can talk about it? Of course, talking in a nice way. I hope you understand. Thanks.
P.S. I just wanna say im really happy that you called me last night when I just got home. Im really glad that you choose to not give up on me. Last night I was so upset, I literally cried and screamed badly in the car on the way back. I just couldnt stop thinking how different my life would be without you. I really really don't wanna lose you. I did my best to salvage the relationship. I don't mind waiting again alone at the void deck. I was just hoping to see you and tell you how much I don't wanna lose you. But you still asked me to go. My heart sank. I just wanted time to stop there so I could hug you forever. I don't wanna let go. I don't wanna lose you. I don't want you to be out of my life ever again. I really didnt know what else I could do. And of course I don't want you to hate me too, I don't want you to feel disgusted that I'm still sticking around hoping that you will change your mind. Eventually I went off. I couldn't bring myself to turn back, I know if I turned back I would just run back to you and hug you and not wanna let go again. I could only watch you go from my side mirror. It hurts so so so badly. I would really love to hear you asking me to stay instead. I thought I lose you forever. I thought I couldn't see you anymore. I thought I couldn't hear your voice anymore. Then what will happen to all our memories? All our things? Where can they go? How can they even be forgotten? I felt super super sad thinking of all these. I really don't know where to start my life from again. I really don't know what can I look forward to anymore. How will my weekends be? How will my valentines be? What if I pass by places that holds memories of us? How can I handle them? I couldnt think straight anymore, I just vent all my sorrows in the car, as much as I can, cause I know nobody can hear (unless the cars beside can hear? But I highly doubt so), cause I know when I reached home, I can't cry to my content anymore since I have to consider about the other family in the house. Every thing I thought of, I just screamed and cried. Until when I turning or taking into another lane, then I cleared my eyes and focus on driving for that min. It was a very very bad night. At your house I was so afraid that I couldn't see you again. I really wanted you to come and meet me do that I can tell you how much I love you how much I don't wanna break up. The call you made was a big comfort to me. I never expected it. But I'm really happy that you still cares about my safety. And im really happy that you are willing to talk to me so nicely. Thanks for not giving up on me. I really love you. Lets not quarrel over some things anymore hao Ma? Let's start talking about it instead hao Ma? Talking has always been missing in our relationship, but we have to admit that communication is the thing that will make a relationship last isn't it? Lets put in effort tgt once more hao bu hao? Since you choose not to give up on me, lets make this decision worthwhile? We both can do it! Because we love each other! Right?
"how was your performance today?"
So I thought I was rather controlled and independent, not relying on anyone to entertain me, trying to stay in the living room as much as I could, and not to get petty. In order to make things better and not let you be in a difficult position, I stopped relying on you to keep me entertained. I tried to be more independent. I tried to find a place for myself. Until I think I'm in a really awkward position, then I moved upstairs and hid in the room. Even if I'm in the room, I never expect you to come for me, I'm just finding myself a more comfortable spot. I know I really need to get out of my comfort zone. I'm trying hard. I know you have been trying to involve me as much as you can, that's why I never thrower temper at you and I never showed any black face too, I never even expect you to do anything for me! I'm trying hard to be independent, I am.
But apparently to another party I still failed badly. Failed to stay in the living all the time, failed to involve myself, failed to talk to others, and I'm still relying on someone to take me by their side.
I was so afraid that you might get angry, so I tried my best to be independent, but in the end you still ended up being angry.
I'm sorry I failed badly again, I caused stress and trouble to you again.
Or maybe we should look at it from a more positive view? At least we are both putting in efforts right? Why cant both of us be more appreciative towards each other and work towards a better experience next time? Instead of pin pointing each others mistake and expect the other party to change to suit? In a relationship yes you have to compromise. But isn't it supposed to be both party compromising tgt and work tgt? It really hurts when you said im causing you to be very stress. Makes me think why am I so sucky and troublesome, why am I such a lousy girlfriend and have such lousy public relations? I know you might feel rather stress that you have to be a good host so that nobody feel left out. But at the same time, I don't feel good either. Do you think I really like to be a burden to someone? Do you think I rather not to have fun? Do you think i dont feel stress? Im also afraid that people might say i keep hiding in the room and being so insociable, that's why I tried my best to stay below, I tried my best to find a spot for myself. But i just dont know what to talk to them about and nobody talks to me, everyone has their own friends, i just cant help but wanting to hide away to a comfortable place. Do you think I never tried? Do you think I like to see you unhappy?
Why is it that others relationship can get better or get more romantic while mine is getting from good to best to bad to worst? I really need some advice or read some books to enlighten myself. I'm lost right now. I no longer know what to do, how to act, what is the appropriate actions or words.
Sometimes I really wished that my ex step mum is still around with me. She is the person on earth who understands me best. Inside out I can say. Whatever my actions are, I don't even have to explain the way I act, she could already tell others why I acted that way. She is the person who involves me most, in her everything. Probably because that time we were living tgt and girls hit off well. She is also the one who will keep singing praises of me to others, telling people how good I am. And best of all, she's the person who teaches me everything, how to put on a pad, how to pluck hair, how to dress up, how to solve my problems and every other things which I was facing back then. She always guide me along and has never once abandon me and let me fend for myself. Now I'm grown up, I need more advice, I need advice really badly now, where are you? Maybe I should try to fb message her and ask how she is. But then again, is that the right thing to do since the relationship between her and my dad isn't good? I really don't know! Omg, why I suck so much, why can't I determine what is the right thing to do and what is the wrong thing to do? I can predict I will be a super lousy mother in the future. Sigh.
Also I would love to express my gratitude towards Gina. So many years of genuine friendship. So many things that she did for me. I know she always wanted the best for me. She knows how much I don't wanna lose you. And even thou she's still sleeping, she gave me 30over missed calls while I was bathing to ensure that I don't miss out on a guy who I wanna be with, who she knows I can't live without. Makes me feel so guilty that I didn't text her the very moment I woke up. I don't know what got into me too, the day before I already told myself that I have to text her if I already woke up before she called. Probably my eyes which can barely hold itself open screwed up my thinking. My eyes were so heavy this morning, I could barely open them. I'm so sorry Gina to disturb your sleep. Thanks for everything that you have done for me. Im really glad to have a friend like you. Really.
Sometimes I really think I'm way smarter in the past, at the very least I still have some goals in mind and I know what I want and what I don't want. And in the past, I'm much more daring (although my dad always say he give birth to me but didn't give me any guts), at least in the past I dare to talk freely, not afraid that I might hurt anyone unintentionally. Now that I grow up, I tend to think of others feelings, I rather not to talk than to afraid that what I say might be offensive to the other party. That's why I'm slowly starting to keep quiet instead of speaking freely. Gosh. Where did all my intelligence and guts goes?! I need advice, I need someone to lead me along to the right path. I need someone to be there to guide me all the way into my future. Who can really offer to be my mentor for the rest of my life? Tell me the right thing to do, and not reprimand me for all the things that I didn't did good enough in. At least I know I'm trying.
Now I feel so much more comfortable after voicing myself out in my blog. I hope you don't find it as I'm looking for a quarrel or trying to push all the fault to you, cause I'm really not. I just wanna let out somewhere, it's not even meant to be read by anyone. And of course I really appreciate your efforts for involving me, stopping your game cause you know I'm bored, finding something for me to do, coming up again and again to bring me down. I really appreciate you. Thanks. I'm sorry that I ruin your day again, I'll try harder next time. Or maybe we could just save all the trouble by me skipping all these kinda events? I'm really ok with that if it's the only way to avoid affecting our relationship. I'm ok with anything as long as it allows our relationship to grow stronger. Or maybe we should start by talking about it together and come to a agreed conclusion together? I really hope you don't get angry with me again cause of this post, cause that is really not my intention. If you don't agree with any parts that I say, maybe we can talk about it? Of course, talking in a nice way. I hope you understand. Thanks.
P.S. I just wanna say im really happy that you called me last night when I just got home. Im really glad that you choose to not give up on me. Last night I was so upset, I literally cried and screamed badly in the car on the way back. I just couldnt stop thinking how different my life would be without you. I really really don't wanna lose you. I did my best to salvage the relationship. I don't mind waiting again alone at the void deck. I was just hoping to see you and tell you how much I don't wanna lose you. But you still asked me to go. My heart sank. I just wanted time to stop there so I could hug you forever. I don't wanna let go. I don't wanna lose you. I don't want you to be out of my life ever again. I really didnt know what else I could do. And of course I don't want you to hate me too, I don't want you to feel disgusted that I'm still sticking around hoping that you will change your mind. Eventually I went off. I couldn't bring myself to turn back, I know if I turned back I would just run back to you and hug you and not wanna let go again. I could only watch you go from my side mirror. It hurts so so so badly. I would really love to hear you asking me to stay instead. I thought I lose you forever. I thought I couldn't see you anymore. I thought I couldn't hear your voice anymore. Then what will happen to all our memories? All our things? Where can they go? How can they even be forgotten? I felt super super sad thinking of all these. I really don't know where to start my life from again. I really don't know what can I look forward to anymore. How will my weekends be? How will my valentines be? What if I pass by places that holds memories of us? How can I handle them? I couldnt think straight anymore, I just vent all my sorrows in the car, as much as I can, cause I know nobody can hear (unless the cars beside can hear? But I highly doubt so), cause I know when I reached home, I can't cry to my content anymore since I have to consider about the other family in the house. Every thing I thought of, I just screamed and cried. Until when I turning or taking into another lane, then I cleared my eyes and focus on driving for that min. It was a very very bad night. At your house I was so afraid that I couldn't see you again. I really wanted you to come and meet me do that I can tell you how much I love you how much I don't wanna break up. The call you made was a big comfort to me. I never expected it. But I'm really happy that you still cares about my safety. And im really happy that you are willing to talk to me so nicely. Thanks for not giving up on me. I really love you. Lets not quarrel over some things anymore hao Ma? Let's start talking about it instead hao Ma? Talking has always been missing in our relationship, but we have to admit that communication is the thing that will make a relationship last isn't it? Lets put in effort tgt once more hao bu hao? Since you choose not to give up on me, lets make this decision worthwhile? We both can do it! Because we love each other! Right?
1:48:00 AM
Sunday, January 29, 2012
β₯ Advice from Yahoo
Just read some golden rules to keep relationship alive article on yahoo. how true or good can that article be? i was super doubtful but picked up two good ones. haha.
"Resentments: Don't hold your pain, hurt or anger inside. If you are harbouring some resentment talk it out and put the matter to rest, so you can enjoy your relationship.""
"Being mean: If you punish your partner when you don't get your way, or if the two of you give each other the silent treatment, you are headed for a lifetime of emotional pain. Stop the nastiness and learn to talk about it."
True enough? haha
Of course, a strong relationship involves lots of love and compromising too!
ok ok. i know i cant manage a relationship well, since i always act rashly, but well, this can be an advice to everyone so i'm sharing it. haha. how nice of me right! (Y)
P.S. To read the article, click HERE
2:51:00 PM
Thursday, January 26, 2012
β₯ Status update of my charmmy kitty hp casing!
Hohoho!! I finally completed it!! So determined to finish it today! I'm proud of myself!!! π it was initially planned to be completed by CNY, but well.... Hahah.
ok I have to admit it doesn't look so nice and the glue i used makes the crystal not so shining. But well, it's hours and days of hardwork! Everytime after i do parts of it, my back starts hurting like mad! Once it was even more painful than my period!! π± Ok maybe it's the posture I'm sitting in. but well, I'm finally done!!!! ππππ»
I shall start using it! Hahaha.
P.S. I love the clothes I bought for CNY!!πππππ
ok I have to admit it doesn't look so nice and the glue i used makes the crystal not so shining. But well, it's hours and days of hardwork! Everytime after i do parts of it, my back starts hurting like mad! Once it was even more painful than my period!! π± Ok maybe it's the posture I'm sitting in. but well, I'm finally done!!!! ππππ»
I shall start using it! Hahaha.
P.S. I love the clothes I bought for CNY!!πππππ
5:45:00 AM
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
β₯ Worst family
This is why I hate my family so much. Even my friends can treat me better.
10:20:00 AM
Sunday, January 22, 2012
β₯ Loosing the drive in life
Nowadays I really prefer not to have any special occasion.
Everything seems to be loosing its meaning.
Everything seems to be loosing its meaning.
2:43:00 PM
Friday, January 20, 2012
β₯ Phone casing
Look at the progress of my phone casing!!! Thou its not a big progress but it's not easy lor, one by one I pasted the crystals lor!! Around 2 hours only this progress π but I'm happy that at least there's progress! Hahah. Not easy! And I used uhu glue instead of the glue they provide. End up My crystals appeared abit blur π not so shining anymore. But well, their glue still need to mix and it drys up so fast! I don't have the patient! Haha
I need more time!! I haven cut hair, haven paint both toes and finger nails, haven buy shoes, etc and it's gonna be new year! π too easy this year!
I need more time!! I haven cut hair, haven paint both toes and finger nails, haven buy shoes, etc and it's gonna be new year! π too easy this year!
12:28:00 AM
